Man In The Radiator

 I'm extremely tired and fading out of my meager existence. Nothing works at all. Here is a strange, nonsensical, and extremely poorly written poem that was born from a dream, from a fevered vision in the disgusting, damaging daylight. Speeding down the highway, I only ever hope for a violent crash to mangle my body beyond recognition. Perhaps I wish to pour all of this self-hatred and perpetual discomfort in the inescapable reality of existing as myself into an empty, unsuspected vessel. Maybe that's partly what this poem is about. Maybe it's partly about trying my best to maintain my weakening grasp on the few things and people in my life I have truly loved, even if it only causes more mutual pain and mental decay. I don't know. I wouldn't read this one if I were you.  Get Rid of the Body I woke up outside myself Twisted inside a skinned pocket of earth Vomit glued to my arms  Flecks of pestilence trapped inside Streaked with rainbow trackmarks Untanned scars  And...

 This is a sort of different one from the rest. What started out as a simple journal entry that poured out of me in the middle of the night during a moment of nightmare-inducing panic was slightly reworked, restructured, edited, and ever so slightly expanded upon to try to make this poem. Mostly because this is what I am fixated on, and also because I haven't written a poem in a bit and my notes and half-starts at new poems have become completely overwhelming and out of control. So I thought I'd ease myself back into it with a simple poem. A simple poem of the same regurgitated personal confessions of pathetic emotions as a strange ritual of self-harm. Needless to say, I really do not like this poem. Potentially more so than the rest, but here it is anyway because whatever...who cares. No one is here, no one cares, it's all collapsing rapidly now and the end is surely in sight.  art by Ken Currie Faded Out  Another failed attempt Trapped under ropes and sawblades Lithium ...

 It has been almost a year since I've finished a short story. I've started a few in that time but neglected to finish any of them, maybe because I didn't actually end up liking the story or lost all faith in my ability to write it, or I simply succumbed to my perpetual battle with apathy and numbness and simply abandoned them due to a lack of effort. Whatever the case may be, I'll try to return to those eventually. This story in particular sort of came from nowhere and nothing. I'm not sure what inspired it outside of the song I was listening to while I first started writing it. Still, I suppose it shares aesthetic and thematic similarities with virtually everything else I write. The character's name and a part of his inner dilemma are the same as one of the main characters from the novel I started working on early last year and then abandoned as well...so, the following could very well be used towards that eventually. If not, then it will be left alone as a sta...