A Disgusting Apocalyptic Landscape Told in a Messy, Overly Long Poem

When I set out to write this, there was no plan other than trying to do something slightly different. And by different, I mean trying to separate it from myself. To not use "I" or "you" and fall into the same old trappings of writing another poem about my previous failures and past events that have yet to stop haunting me. However, this isn't really all that different at all. I have written about all of this before, many times before. It is always a new apocalypse being painted in my head, always a new nightmare that I have to subject others to so as not to be totally alone with it. And it frequently ends with my damnation of the entire human race. I love so many on this earth, and yet I see no other solution than to rid this planet of this ongoing blight that is humanity. And I see no other possible future other than our inevitable horrifying destruction of each other. There's no point really in even writing about it anymore. It doesn't help with anything. And as much as I feel tormented by all of these thoughts and intrusive visions of violence and decay, I have to also admit to a certain enjoyment out of my attempts at painting another description of the apocalypse as I see it in my head. 

One last thing. There are descriptions of animal violence in the following regurgitation of writing. The reason was due to a nightmare I had that was basically exactly how I described it in the poem below. It was awful and I don't want to think about it anymore, but it will never leave me. At least writing about it makes it have some sort of vague purpose outside of simply torturing me. 

Sorry about this whole thing. Goodbye for now. 

art by vergvoktre

Continue All Suffering

Chemical grains of sand

Avalancing down nuclear-blasted colony

Radiated ants gnaw and crawl out of flowered skulls

Blistered with expanding fragments

Of crystallized bone

Stretching out like emancipated corpses

Magnetized out from their graves,

Reaching to usher forth 

A final blood-soaked moon. 

Pregnant animals face down 

In kerosene rivers

The pool of decay creeping underneath

A slow sizzling bisection

While the innocent eyes still blink 

Out from their eroded stomachs slip out

Premature, ill-formed fetuses 

Coiled, trembling, swaddled in radiated afterbirth

Born into the swirling firmament 

Of their mothers’ twitching conscious dissolve. 

Only food left

Found in the tsunami of liquefied organs

And burning fur. 

Whimpering, starved babies’ cries reach

The highest possible pitch

Right before their vocal chords singe and snap, 

Send out the luckily failed lives

Up along with the next weaponized assault 

On the governing stars. 

It’s begun to rain 

During the apocalypse,

The torrential unmaking 

Of all that was done,

Human atrocities piled up 

Like hideous rubble 

Left after the bombing of the planet 

During the final, total war. 

An attempt at new, manipulated life

Stigmata’s seep lead paint 

From the crucified, masked, sexless child

Down onto broken, unscrewed joints 

Of the aborted, dismantled

Puppet body 

Reeking of sulfur and sweet, golden rot.

Gaze into the hollow eyes,

A misguided conception 

Torture it, flay it, pummel its brain 

Into unending psychological torment,

Discard it, and start anew.

This is all far from over. 

Time has no place here

Amongst the dregs, the few surviving lot 

Gormless, automaton,

Their desires like broken clockwork. 

Cannibal lovers reunite

At the end of the world, 

Each other’s saliva

Still slicking back their hair,

Fragments of broken, sharpened teeth

Lodged in their radiated limbs

Like new scabs healing over shrapnel.

Tattooed centipedes shake off their lips

At their deathly divine convergence

Met in the imprisoning dollhouse

Where deafening amnesia and devouring desire

Rapidly infects

Manifestations of their fatal love

Dissolved, discarded

Grand mistakes unlearned

Weeping and shivering, they passionately collide

The tectonic plates crumble

Mushroom clouds expunge anemic trees 

A carnival light show of nuclear fireworks 

Raining viscous fallout DNA

As their wounds unfurl like butterflies 

Or neoplastic little birds hatching 

From multicolored schisms,

And once more, they escape into each other

Inverted, contorted, pallid, and gloriously mutilated,

They disappear. 

Elsewhere;

A lonely naked androgynous body 

Straddles an unmarked, withered grave

Beneath a sickly gray dawn 

And a sonic tempest of heralding horns

Heaving open the dreamless skies,

A soiled plastic bag stretched taut over their face,

They tilt their angular head back and suck in their features

And blindly watch 

The great passing corpse of Lilith 

Rot along with the sun. 

Boney jagged jester mask laughs in the stars,

Dripping toxic wax of new creation

Down upon the carrion soil,

The eradicated disaster left of the Earth,

A swollen shut eye for a planet,

An abandoned autopsy 

Unending underground of flesh-covered tunnels,

A fallopian tube highway 

Birthing new, mutated worms

Out from miles of canvas 

Made up from alchemical artificial pores. 

Cloaked inhuman butchers place themselves

In opened shadowed statues

After leaving behind their final creations,

Great ornaments of children’s 

Severed singing heads,

Done up like a minstrel show

Hooked unto the fractured feverish fabric

Of the ruined atmosphere

Left to observe the progression 

Of mass human decomposition. 

Now there’s nothing left to believe in,

If there was ever anything at all,

There’s nowhere left to run to,

And no one to make evidence 

Of our fall.

An infested nightmare landscape

Drowns each and every member of this disgusting lot,

As the past consumes the future 

And the atomic destruction 

Bears its onslaught of slaughtering deformities

Towards our slow, agonizing extinction. 

And yet

It’s still far less

Than what we all deserve. 

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